A Dream......From a REAL Person's Perspective

Each and everyday I strive for the best, trying to maintain a good life for me and mine. I pay bills, go to school, take care of my kids, and take care of home. At the end of the day, where am I, who am I? Those are all of the questions I ask myself after all of the tough things are done. I can never come up with nothing, everything that I say sounds stupid!! "Your strong, your great, your loving and supportive" those all sound great, but are those descriptions who I really am? NO, they are not!! I live pay check to pay check, I hardly get to get myself anything, Im late on a few bills, and Im not doing well in class!! That's the real me, the imperfect person, and I love that about me!!! I dont want to live a DREAM of perfection.....I want to be ME!!! Those bills are late, those checks are short, not doing well in class, and I hardly buy myself anything....it's okay!! Things will get better, and Im LOVING me through it all!!!

Temptation Can Bite You in the_______(short blog)

Have you ever wanted  something soooo bad and you would do anything to get it??? Even though you know it's no good for you? You try so hard to forget it, ignore it, and dislike it but all of that doesn't work? You end up falling for it chasing it, and everything goes all bad!! Well everyone has been in that situation and you know what I have learned? Never make the same mistake twice. When there is something you want and you know its bad for you, drop everything and RUUUNNN!!!! It's almost like trying to figure out what is the difference between a want and a need. We as human beings tend to go after what we really dont need. Whether it's a person, or something materialistic, we have to ask ourselves, "Is it worth it?"
For a long time I would lust after my kids father, and I kept getting hurt in the end. I made a huge mistake thinking that my lust for him was actually love and it wasn't. Point is, if what you "want" so very badly hurts you over and over again, you dont need it. Take it back, let it go, throw it away and trust me things will get better from that point on. Don't be fooled!!! Think with your brain sometimes and NOT your HEART!!!

Letting yourself down is NOT an option!!! Don't force relationships!!

I must say that becoming a parent made me grow up quicker than I wanted to. I am now 27, and I sometimes feel like I'm 47. I no longer put up with foolishness, I pay more attention to my surroundings, and my time means so much more to me than ever before. Sure there are plenty of other things that has changed about me, but those are just to name a few. Now, moving on to why I gave this blog the title, "Letting yourself down is NOT an option". I said that for many many reasons, and its very important because it's no longer just about you, it's you and your little bundle of joy, so it's twice the responsibility.
I have seen people have children, and have bad relationships with the mother or the father. What is even worse, they try and try to make things work for the sake of the child(ren). Let me be the one to tell you that, forcing a relationship because of the child(ren) is not a great idea. Don't get me wrong, sometimes things can work themselves out, however during all of the disagreements, fussing and fighting that child is taking all of it in. Another point Im trying to make is that when you continuously give a person chance after chance, you can no longer be mad at them be mad at yourself for allowing them to fail you over and over again. Don't let yourself or your children down just because you want to make something that is not picture perfect, perfect. Makes sense?
Letting yourself down while being a young parent shows, and your child can sense when something isn't right. I have seen this first-hand. My children know when Im sad, irritated, or upset. Don't think just because your child can't talk, or is just too young know any better; that they dont sense when things aren't right. If you and the father or mother of your child aren't on the same page, then find a way to get to that place. If you know deep down that you are not ready to be with that person, be honest with them and most important; be honest with yourself. Trust me, forcing relationships can be a waste, and you have to ask yourself.......Is this really even real?
Overall, I know I rambled on a little, and most of the time I do that in live conversations. My mind runs a million miles a minute and I have to get it all out. Anywho, make sure you dont let yourself down because as I always say, your kids depend on you. Focusing on relationships that YOU know won't work or isn't the best for you child......let it go!!! We all want the perfect family, house, car and kids.......remember, nothing is perfect, but strive for the best!!!

Fatherless Child......Sons or Daughters, it Hurts No Matter What!!

FatherlessChild

Searching........

Have you ever said to yourself, that you would never leave your child's side no matter the circumstances? Have you ever said, that you would always love and never miss a moment with your child? Well I say this all of the time, and stand firm with those words. I can't wrap my mind around a reason why a person would not want to be in their children's lives. They are a image of you, you help bring this child in the world, and they give you love like no other. Growing up, I seen my Father from time to time. I would never see or spend time with him on a daily basis. All I had to look to was my older brother, and that was not his responsibility to be my father. Reaching my teen years I would cry for him, and wonder why he never wanted to be around like the other dads I saw in my surroundings. I started to blame myself, and I started to blame my mother for not pushing him to do what he was suppose to do. At that time I just didn't get it, and I was growing angry and frustrated with it all. I wanted to have a father in my life so bad that I would go and look for one. Not actually searching, but when I came across a man that I liked I would smother them with my phone calls, visits, and just wanting them to be there and never leave. It was a struggle to understand that neither of those men that I thought I loved, or cared for could never be the father that I needed.

Moving On....

I know that there are more than a few things in life that you just have to walk away from. You can only do and say so much, and things aren't changing, then it is time to move on. I had to learn that the hard way with dealing with my father. I continued to believe that he would come around, and he didn't. I continued to believe that he would call, but he didn't. As much as I needed him to just be there, I had to move on. I'm not saying that I just completely ignored him, or acted as if he never existed. I simply put my feelings to the side and thought more with my mind rather than my heart.

Source:http://www.groundnotecounseling.com/img_1248748010...

We Need You....

I can assure any male, that all daughters need their fathers. I understand that men have special relationships with their sons, but your daughters need you too. They need a good father to look up to, so when she is in her adulthood she would know how to be treated. She needs you for advice, security, and just the love. A father who is there for the good and the bad. Her first break-up, her first job, and when walks down that aisle. Fathers also need to know that it isnt all about how much money you can spend, or what kind of car you buy for you daughter, but it is all about time being spent. Its about listening to her, and enjoying the conversations you and your daughter has. Get to know your daughter, because there will be times where she doesn't want to go to mom and she will look for you. You surely don't want her to find a father image in the streets. Be there, protect her, and love her and trust me she will love you back.

Why I Wrote This

I wrote this blog because I too wanted my father growing up. I had a short conversation with my father the other night and I usually write blogs to vent. This is why this blog is so short. I honestly feel like I can relate to a variety of people, and people would understand where I am coming from. I have been through quite a bit, single mother of three, and I too grew up fatherless. I'm praying that someone reads this, and could possibly feel better. I know it sounds bad, but just to know that you are not alone and you can move forward with the things that bother you. I always say, things happen for a reason, learn from it, and Move On. Try not to dwell on the past if it isn't positive, and work on making more positive memories for you to look back on.

Don't Be Discouraged

Being a young parent can throw all types of curve balls your way. So many things going on in your life, and it can become a bit overwhelming. Remember to not let negative comments get you down. Don't think that when your parents give you a lecture, it's just to get you upset or they think you don't know any better; it's actually because they care.
One thing that I have learned when I was a teen parent, is to keep my head up and continue on with my life. I try not to dwell on things because I have responsibilities and that includes the life I brought into this world. There were plenty times where I did become discouraged and was not sure about what to do, or who to talk too. I was so depressed when filling out applications, I was unsure of what college to attend, and I was just lost in a huge world where everyone has their own issues and mine was no where near important. Being discouraged, sad, and disappointed in myself led me to missing life. When I say life, I mean everything that was going on around me was just a blur. I could only think about, what went wrong in my life rather than thinking of all the positive that was going on and what positive things I could bring to the table. That is why I say, Don't Be Discouraged. I wasted so much time, that a few years after my first child went by and I hadn't finished school yet. I ended up getting my GED in 2007 which is 3 years after my son was born. I missed out on jobs, and even family time. All because I let the negative take over my life, and I would dwell on that.
I want to let teen parents know that you should always push forward and never look back. Make sure that no matter what goes on, you have to make sure that you set the right example for your children. Provide for them, be there for them, and show them all of the right things to do. Don't worry or even acknowledge what they negative people have to say, you just Don't Be Discouraged. 
Personal Note:
Today was a tough day for me, and felt like I was going back to the way I was when I was just 18 getting ready for my first child. I came on here because it has been a while, plus I know that Im not the only one who feels this way sometimes. As I always say, if I can do it then so can anyone else. I don't condone teen pregnancy however I know that it can happen!!! Please dont ever be discouraged, life is short, and time waits on no one......Most importantly, your child(ren) need you no matter what the case may be.

Healthy Mothers Make A Happy Healthy Baby....

Mothers and Fathers, I can't stress the fact that we have to stay healthy not only for ourselves but for our kids. During pregnancy and after pregnancy it is very important that we take care ourselves because we have to be there for them. One more issue I want to talk about is learning how to do C.P.R if you have not done so already. I will get to that in just a few. Young parents, you have to know that the little bundle of joy will be soon a burst of energy and you have to keep up. I know your thinking that it can be a bit tiring when they are infants, but trust me....there is more!! By the time your little bundle of joy turns 10 months, they will be exploring the world with their little fingers and eyes. Everything is so big to them, and amazing all at the same time. You want to make sure that you get enough rest, and eat right so you will be able to keep up with them. I know your saying, "how can I get any rest with so much to do?" Well here is a little something I have learned over the years. Number one and most important, have a set schedule. Make sure that you have some type of routine that your child can grow accustomed to. Even if you are a stay at home parent, make a schedule anyway. Breakfast at a certain time, play time, nap time, lunch etc. Stick to the plan, otherwise you could have a baby who wants to play at 3 in the morning and you are struggling to get any sleep. Number two, when your baby is a infant there are going to be times where your baby wants to be fed in the middle of the night, and well, that is just how newborns do. However, I would always take naps when my baby took naps. I know that it seems to be difficult, but believe me it works. Finally number three, make sure you are eating healthy. Believe me, when you eat right, you feel great. All bad foods tends to slow you down and you feel like yo have no energy left in your body. I promise if you follow these steps, you should be fine.
On to some more important information for our young parents. Children can get into everything, and that is why we have to great parents and learn a few things that could possibly save our children from harm. Learning C.P.R is very important and everyone in the household should know how to do so. Sometimes you say to yourself, that things would never happen in your home but that isn't true. It could happen so it is best to be safe than sorry. I would advise all young parents, mothers and fathers to be to go and sign up for classes just to be safe. You can contact your local hospital, or red cross facilities to find out when classes are held. I truly hope that you guys take heed to what I have posted, because I have three and believe me, I may not be the best parent in the world, but I love my three and I have and will do anything for them.....Hope your enjoyed this and there will be more to come........